My breastfeeding journey.

Salam and Hi!

*Warning; Mommy related post ahead hehehehhh. 

Oh wow. 

Breastfeeding. 

I decided to fully breastfeed my baby simply because..

First, 

- I sort of implanted in my mind that I have no other choice! 

Man, I do not wanna think about how expensive formulas are now.. 

Second, 

- I personally feel that I should really try to breastfeed because it's my baby's right to have her milk from me.. and that I would personally feel guilty deep down if I don't do so..

Third, 

- I wanted to have this kind of bond with my baby (or babies, I hope!;] )

My breastfeeding journey wasn't really an easy one, I'd say. 

I had no idea what I was doing and no one told me how to do it, what to expect from it..nothing. 

I just knew that it is best for my baby and that it would not be a problem to breastfeed cuz it will naturally produce once the baby is out. 

Never once I thought that there would be PAINFUL times! 

-.-'

*She's probably 4/5 months old here

Right after I gave birth to Amani, she wasn't with me in the normal ward because she had to be admitted and be on antibiotics to prevent infections from the induced labor. 

So I didn't get to directly nurse her on that day - only get to try the next day. 

She was cup fed with formula by the nurses & I immediately tried nursing her the next day.

She latched on quite well, so I thought she was actually getting some milk out of me..

I thought wrong wahaha. 

Amateur mommy, I was!*probably still is!;

I actually thought she was full and all from my milk -.-'

Little did I know that she was actually full from her cup feedings lah! 

It was when I get to bring her home I finally knew that she wasn't latching on properly because of my inverted nipples. #tmi (ehems pardon me) 

That's when the first pain started...

T.T 

Because she wasn't latching on well, so it got engorged T.T 

It was HORRIBLE. 

So painful I didn't know what to do!!

I cried alone in my room scrolling my contacts frantically searching for my Mommy friends lol. 

Whatsapped almost all the young mommies I know for help. 

A friend suggested me to get a warm cloth to put over it ( breasts lol) and try to express the milk out 

because if I were to let it be I would easily get a fever from it. 

I tried putting on cabbage on it as well.

Those two advice really helped me a lot. 

The first couple of weeks wasn't easy at all but at that time we also fed her with KariHome's Goat's formula milk cuz we needed to lower down her jaundice. 

So it was alternate between formula feeds & mine. 

So glad that I didn't give up after going through that and also super thankful because it was quite a smooth journey after that. 

OMG I can't believe how small she was! Just the size of my palm! :O

But...the pain didn't stop there. 

So far my worst breastfeeding experience! 

Amani caught thrush few months back when we were travelling.. 

Oh my goodness, it was so so bad when she passed it on to me! 

For those who are not familiar with thrush, it is something like ulcer but not as painful for the baby. 

Google it if you are keen to know more.. 

Anyhoo, 

thrush is worrying because if a baby is breastfeeding exclusively, baby might give it to their mothers because thrush transfers from their mouth to your bewbs. 

IT.WAS.EXCRUCIATING.

Hmmm I really really wanna describe more, but I am not sure on how sensitive my readers are when it comes to me sharing my breastfeeding experiences..

So I guess by saying that it was totally a terrible experience would explain it all. 

and again, 

I thank God for giving me the patience!

It definitely wasn't easy.

So so glad that it's over! 

Alhamdulillah, now it is all back to normal again. teeeheee. 

She needs to be nursed whenever she wants to sleep or nap.

I am honestly okay with that cuz I believe that when the weaning day comes she will eventually stop on her own. 

She still drinks at night few times as well, which is also not a big problem for me cuz she co-sleeps with us so I get to sleep even when she's nursing because now she knows how to unlatch on her own. 

My breastfeeding journey so far is a wonderful and will definitely be a memorable one & I am typing this out for keepsake purposes because I have a memory of a goldfish.

errr not that I know how fish's memories are.. hehehehe. 

You're the best, mommies! 

It doesn't really matter whether you are a breastfeeding mommy or not.. 

It's not as easy as it seems and not everyone will have the privilege to do so. 

Non breastfeeding moms are still awesome; Mothers are simply amazing. 

Motherhood has changed me so much, 

so I hope my dear readers will happily join me through my motherhood life.

I guess there will be lesser OOTDs and make up posts ..

Let's wait till Amani's a bit older so she could join me in my OOTDs!;)

I will treat my blog as one of my online diaries now, to keep the memories so Amani could read them when she's older!

Dearest readers, 

Thank you for being with me all these while & I welcome you to another phase of my life!

I'll blog again soon!;)